My life was going so well for me and now it just seems to get worse and worse.

-I have lost my job and currently unable to find another

-I still have a large vet bill of £872 and i'm barley able to pay that

-Barney should probably see a vet as he really is not putting weight on and having trouble eating here and there. I still worry he may end up being put down if I go to the vets.

-Due to barney's illness it's now been talked about retiring him from my service dog leaving me with even less confidence and likely to cause more panic attacks.

-My mum offered to pay for mike's (my fiancee) flight ticket to uk then said she can only pay half and now she says she can only pay £200 and the ticket is £600 (I have £200 but mike can not gather up $300 before the flights go up again)

-I'm arguing almost daily with mike and I feel he just no longer wants to bother with me

-My depression and suicidal thoughts have come back and it's so hard to hide them from people and I even had a panic attack this morning after going almost a month without one.



I just don't know what to do anymore.